A very special Whore's Birthday!

Hello everyone!

Tonight it is just me, British Bitch. I gave American Whore the night off, due to the fact that it's her BIRTHDAY TODAY!! yay!

I just want to take this moment to wish her a very happy birthday, and that I hope she has a wonderful day. I couldn't have asked for a better friend or met a nicer Whore.

You are like the other half of me and now that I have found you I don't know what I would do without you.

If I could give you this gorgeous man then I would!

Ok so enough of the soppy shit! 

Did you guys check out Robert Pattinson's, Details, Photoshoot last week? Oh. My. God. Sweet baby Jesus, he looked like a mother fucking god. In my dreams Rob is usually surrounded by naked women, now all I need is for those naked women to be me!

Here's a couple of my fav shots from the shoot:

Fucking hot aren't they? UNF! See this is what happens when you let me take total control, you end up with Rob pic spam!! :P

Updates (no JxB, sorry ladies!):

Beautiful, Dirty, Rich by Kiki Blue - ExB - Summary: One Bet. One Week. No Rules. Bella bets Edward that after a week of some raw sexcapades he won’t want to stop. He bets her otherwise. A slightly tongue in cheek smutathon and my first fan-fic. Follow Cullen’s and Co to see what it means to be Beautiful, Dirty and Rich. Finally we get to see why Edward ran off after his night with Bella! Its been killing me for weeks now! Did he just go out for coffee like I was praying to be the case? Or did he have a freak out like I fear the most? Well KiKi did not disappoint. Poor Edward is just an roller coaster of emotions. His whole world is turned around upside down in one night; his playboy father has fallen in love and wants to get married; his best friend and wingman is also madly in love and in a serious relationship; plus he's having confusing feelings about a girl who he's not supposed to have any feelings at all for!! Tough break for Edward. To top it all off he finds out that Bella is going on her date with Jacob... Personally I think Edward should crash the date, mainly for comedic value, but also with a good incentive of showing her how much he cares, even if it is indirectly. Anyway, this is one of my all time fav stories and I NEED you to go check it out. Send Kiki my love, ok?

Demon's and Sinners by Alsper - AxJ - Summary: Everyone has a demon that makes you sin. Can Alice escape the violence to find her white rabbit? Will Jasper see through the pain for his true salvation? AH/AU Not intended for the weak hearted. Rated M for Sex, Drugs and Violence. This chapter was the prologue chapter!! Ahh!! Omg so many surprises in this chapter but I think Alsper wrote it really well. Its sad to think that this story will be coming to an end soon, I have followed it from the start and fallen in love with the characters as well as the authors. Its been a very emotional roller coaster and I am very interested to see how they wrap this story up. Will we get a glimpse into the future and see that time heals all wounds or will they leave us guessing as to weather Jazzy and Kitten finally got their happy ending? I didn't want to give too much away about this chapter, so I shall discuss more about what happened when they next update! Mwahaha, I'm evil like that. So go fucking read it if you really want to know what happened!

Daniel Gale: Cumming to America - Summary: Nerdalicious Daniel Gale is saying goodbye to England and hello to the United States. Looking to reinvent himself, he is all too gratified by the corn-fed derriers of Americans. Daniel Gale/Twilight cross over, slightly crackfic, AU, AH, Prepare for Perv Oh my god. Daniel has me giggling all the way through this. As a British person, I fear you may look at him and think that is what all our guys are like, but trust me when I say he's an exception. And don't go looking at Huge Grant to see what our lads are like either!! Anyway back to the story! Daniel has spent this entire chapter worrying about getting nervous erections in the locker room and trying to make his move on Bella. With a little help from Emmett, by the end of the chapter he's really made some progress and mastered the art of bumping and grinding! However will all that food and alcohol mess up his chances? I have a sinking feeling that it might. Poor Danny Boy. Can't wait for the next chapter this story is my candy, at the moment, in amongst all my angst and smut.

The Misapprehension of Bella Swan by hunterhunting - ExB - Summary: The Misapprehension of Bella Swan Regarding the Inferior Intellect of Hockey Players: Through incessant stalking and persistence, can Edward wear down Bella's resistence and teach her to embrace her inner puck bunny? A ridiculous love story. AH/OCC. UNNF! I don't think i've ever watched a whole game of ice hockey... but man do I ever want to go to one now. I think hunterhunting could make anything sexy... she has opened up so many avenues for me that I never even thought about, sad as it is, I never even took much notice of tattoo's now one of the first things I ask a guy is if he has one :P I know what i'll be asking him now..."How big is your hockey stick? Will it damage my beaver? I don't really fancy having a busted beaver." *giggles a lot*  Its sassy, classy, entertaining and sexy as hell.

If you end up reading one of these beauties makes sure you let the author know where you heard about it!

Many thanks for reading.

A happy birthday again to Jess!

Your Rose and Bella.